7 times 7 - for anyone trying to carry their own burdens

Psalm 106:8 "Yet He saved them for His name's sake, that He might make known His mighty power."

This is playing catch-up from a few days ago, when I missed an entry. The day got away from me and I just never got it done. I didn't mean to miss. I wasn't intentionally trying to stay away from God's word. But little decisions, snowballing throughout the day, made for the end of the day to look much differently than I imagined.

This can happen all the time. I think I'm going to exercise, but one thing after another gets in the way and by the end of the day I'm just too tired. I can intend to clean the bathroom, or call a friend, or finish a book, or write that note I've been meaning to, or a million other little things that get shifted around my schedule on a near daily basis. All day long, I have little choices to make, which seem inconsequential, but at the end of the day, week, month - I see the impact of them.

We can view this type of behavior two ways - first, I can say, "hey, those were all good intentions. I meant to do it well, so no one can really fault me for dropping the ball." Or I can say, "I'm a failure - lazy - self centered - full of half hearted empty promises" Depending on your societal norms, family upbringing and personality, one of those may resonate really well with you. The truth is, American's tend to excuse those things unsaid and undone, referencing our good natures and good intentions and describing the busy life most of us lead. But biblically, that really isn't true. And frankly, in our hearts, we don't want it to be true.

I think we want to believe the baseline good nature of people, because we have seen the darkness of ourselves and we hope that there is something more. I think we want to optimistically view those good intentions as being "good enough" because we aren't sure we could ever be held to a higher standard. Somewhere we are hoping that no one can fault our flaws, but we know that doesn't make sense. If you can't fault my mistakes, how can I fault yours? And whose scale do we use for judging if my mistake is better or worse than yours? We know deep down in our hearts that a true standard exists and we are all falling short of it - but we don't know how to save ourselves.

That is precisely what makes this verse so powerful - God saves me for His name's sake - to make His power known. He is not judging my worthiness and then weighing my sin on a scale and deciding what to do - He already knows I am unworthy and there is a just result for my sin.

You see, outside of Christ, I have to rely on basically being a good person, with the inner terror that I'm not. I know all of my nasty thoughts and mean ideas and white lies. I know how even when I really, really want to do good, I am still so easily swayed by temptation to serve myself and my desires of the moment. I couldn't carry that burden - so we stay at the surface level of our thoughts and blow it off. "It's not that bad. I'm basically a good person. There are people a lot worse than me." We can't live under that weight of sin if we are actively thinking about it, so we repress those thoughts and captivate our mind with trivial, temporal, happy things. Or focus on the faults of others. Anything to keep me from taking a hard , honest look at myself.

But in Him, I've been saved for His name's sake. In Him, I've been saved as a demonstration of His glory and power. In Him, I'm something beautiful, holy and set apart to be in His kingdom - His family. As long as we think we have to be worthy of being saved, we will either fall into despair or we will reject that need entirely. But once we understand the gift of grace, I can stop running from God and run to Him instead. I can welcome His cleansing power, no longer shamed by sin but rejoicing to see it all wash away.

I still have those things unsaid and undone - and sometimes those things that I shouldn't have said or done but I did anyway. But I don't have to pretend they aren't there or punish myself for failing again. I can confess them and thank God for His mercy and ask Him to help me to turn away completely from the sin that so easily entangles. He wanted to save us - it is His desire that we would be His - and He knows all the baggage we bring. He will carry it to the cross and it will be left there. Oh the deep, deep love of Jesus!

Thank You Lord for saving me. I brought You nothing but sin and stains and You gave me everything in return. Help me to live more for You and let Your glory shine through me, for Your name's sake!