Today is September 14th and should mark the last day of my grandmother's cancer treatment. Instead, we are eight weeks into the process and only have four weeks of treatment completed. Three weeks ago Tuesday, Nana was moved to the hospital with a fever and seemingly perpetual vomiting. We have since found out she had a large ulcer just below her stomach that I am sure was inflaming the vomiting. The lack of nutrition and strength remains a factor that made what we thought would be a quick hospital trip into nearly a month of delays, questions, downward spirals and small improvements. She is now at Kindred, a beautiful rehab facility, stable but silent and Monday we will speak to the oncologist to find out next steps.
September 14th was a date we were counting down to and it looks very different than we ever imagined. It is hard not to feel defeated in a small way. It is harder still to ignore the reality that we are not in charge and this process will not submit to our schedule and preconceived ideas.
For me, there is a difficulty where my faith is being tested and tried and I find myself lacking. 1 John 4:18 says "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love." Why am I fearful of the future if I am being perfected in love? Why do I associated difficulty with punishment, like Job's friends, instead of knowing that God is perfecting my faith? "And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." (James 1:4)
Last night Mom and I were on the phone, talking about the very real difficulty we experience processing this stage of our lives. We are so limited in our perspective and cannot yet see how God is using this to our good and for His glory. But His nature, eternal and unchanging, means that He has already gone before us, is on the other side, and walks each step beside us in His perfect love. Our minds cannot comprehend how He is truly timeless and limitless, but I have seen it in these past 3 months. From the very first trip to the hospital till our non-anniversary today, I have seen how God is personally comforting, encouraging, growing and meeting all of our individual needs in a very personal way. Yet, He remains over all things, Creator and upholding all things by the word of His power. (Hebrews 1:3) I cannot comprehend this infinite and personal God, as in my own tiny sphere, I have lost track of areas of my life, lost contact with friends and felt pulled in so many different directions. If I can't keep my little piece of the world turning, how can God keep all of our lives so perfectly in His hand? I don't know how He does it - but I am absolutely confident that He is actively doing it - with the power of the Almighty Creator and the love of our Eternal Father.
September 14th will not mark the end of Nana's cancer treatment. But it is another day the Lord has given us all to experience His sufficiency. It is another day to choose to believe Him instead of the lies in my head and heart. It is another day to cast of fear and be surrounded by His love.
This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)
Friday, September 14, 2012
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Musings
I haven't been writing as much here lately because I have been focusing much of my time on my grandmother's Caringbridge blog. I don't mind writing the other blog at all, but I have some musings in my head that just feel like they need to get out.
Much of my thoughts have been circling around core lies and their impact. I find that somehow we have adopted lies that have such a great hold on our hearts and minds that we no longer hear them as lies, but rather as truth. For example, the other day I was driving around with my children and in a very odd turn of events, the boys decide they no longer want treats except on special occasions. This decision is quick and easy and seemingly firm, as they decide I don't need to buy them dessert for their lunches that week. My first reaction is amazement. Not because the 8 year old twins don't want treats, but because I have wrestled with my own self control issues involving treats my whole life and my boys make it seem so easy. I have a core lie that I wrestle with food. I've done all sorts of diets, read a wonderful book Made to Crave and spoken about this issue with doctors friends and counselors. I believe I have an issue with food. But this is a lie. Food is an inanimate object with no power. It can't talk to me, no matter how many times I've said "chocolate calls out my name" and it has no authority over my life. Core lie.
Another core lie can deal with your appearance, relationships, personal flaws and they give us excuses not to try. For example, if one of my core lies deals with my pride, it is now something out of my control. It becomes my identity. "I wrestle with pride." Now, I have an excuse for any time I am proud. "Well, no surprise there. I do wrestle with pride." I am no longer responsible for the sin but instead have characterized myself with something that is unchangeable till Christ returns.
We are fallen people in a fallen world. There are sins we will wrestle with until we die. But what does Paul say when he talks about his "thorn in his flesh"? He says that through this, he knows Christ is sufficient. He is strong in the Lord, not in himself. (2 Corinthians 12) The point is not to be perfect, but rather to trust in God's strength. He is the one who is perfecting us. Paul also talks about disciplining himself to continually strive to be like Christ. In 1 Corinthians 9, Paul states that he does all things for the glory of God. When Jesus intercedes for the prostitute, He sends the Pharisees away saying that he who is without sin should throw the first stone in John chapter 8. But then He also tells her "go and sin no more". He gives her freedom from condemnation, but also tells her not to sin. At the end of the chapter, He explains to the disciples that anyone who sins is a slave to sin, but He is the truth and once you have the Truth, you are free.
You may not feel like a slave to sin, but there is a place in all of us where we are slaves to our own experiences, a history of failures, rejections and feeling like we are less than what we should be. We hear lies so clearly they become truth and we excuse our behavior and attitudes, comfortable in our familiar sins. But if we hear His voice, if we hear His truth, we are able to move past what we were and truly be free.
My grandmother is sick, but should recover. People who speak to her have this sense that she has given up and that if she truly believes she is going to die, her life may end, even though medically it could have been healed. Is that any different than my lies about self image, pride, or past relationships? Is that any different than if the prostitute, being saved by Jesus, returned to her life of sin?
Jesus wants to be our strength in our weakness but He also wants us to be more like him. He loves us too much to leave us as we are. Are we too stubborn to be like Him?
Much of my thoughts have been circling around core lies and their impact. I find that somehow we have adopted lies that have such a great hold on our hearts and minds that we no longer hear them as lies, but rather as truth. For example, the other day I was driving around with my children and in a very odd turn of events, the boys decide they no longer want treats except on special occasions. This decision is quick and easy and seemingly firm, as they decide I don't need to buy them dessert for their lunches that week. My first reaction is amazement. Not because the 8 year old twins don't want treats, but because I have wrestled with my own self control issues involving treats my whole life and my boys make it seem so easy. I have a core lie that I wrestle with food. I've done all sorts of diets, read a wonderful book Made to Crave and spoken about this issue with doctors friends and counselors. I believe I have an issue with food. But this is a lie. Food is an inanimate object with no power. It can't talk to me, no matter how many times I've said "chocolate calls out my name" and it has no authority over my life. Core lie.
Another core lie can deal with your appearance, relationships, personal flaws and they give us excuses not to try. For example, if one of my core lies deals with my pride, it is now something out of my control. It becomes my identity. "I wrestle with pride." Now, I have an excuse for any time I am proud. "Well, no surprise there. I do wrestle with pride." I am no longer responsible for the sin but instead have characterized myself with something that is unchangeable till Christ returns.
We are fallen people in a fallen world. There are sins we will wrestle with until we die. But what does Paul say when he talks about his "thorn in his flesh"? He says that through this, he knows Christ is sufficient. He is strong in the Lord, not in himself. (2 Corinthians 12) The point is not to be perfect, but rather to trust in God's strength. He is the one who is perfecting us. Paul also talks about disciplining himself to continually strive to be like Christ. In 1 Corinthians 9, Paul states that he does all things for the glory of God. When Jesus intercedes for the prostitute, He sends the Pharisees away saying that he who is without sin should throw the first stone in John chapter 8. But then He also tells her "go and sin no more". He gives her freedom from condemnation, but also tells her not to sin. At the end of the chapter, He explains to the disciples that anyone who sins is a slave to sin, but He is the truth and once you have the Truth, you are free.
You may not feel like a slave to sin, but there is a place in all of us where we are slaves to our own experiences, a history of failures, rejections and feeling like we are less than what we should be. We hear lies so clearly they become truth and we excuse our behavior and attitudes, comfortable in our familiar sins. But if we hear His voice, if we hear His truth, we are able to move past what we were and truly be free.
My grandmother is sick, but should recover. People who speak to her have this sense that she has given up and that if she truly believes she is going to die, her life may end, even though medically it could have been healed. Is that any different than my lies about self image, pride, or past relationships? Is that any different than if the prostitute, being saved by Jesus, returned to her life of sin?
Jesus wants to be our strength in our weakness but He also wants us to be more like him. He loves us too much to leave us as we are. Are we too stubborn to be like Him?
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Tired of boxes?
I was listening to this great song by Brit Nicole "Ready or Not" that talks about letting our light shine. She says "you want to fit it in your box" but instead she is going to show you where the light comes from because "this is who I am and I won't hide it".
Lecrea adds to the song by saying the light is "everything I am, it's the source of my hope and the reason why I stand". This idea is extremely biblical, in stating that the our light is from God, who is our identity and that the light is meant to shine. Jesus says in Luke 8 that a lamp is meant to be on a lamp stand for all to see. In John 8 Jesus calls Himself the light of the world and in Matthew 5 calls the disciples the light of the world, with the purpose of bringing glory to the Father through their good works.
This has me thinking a lot about identity. People can be identified by their tax bracket, their title at work, their political affiliation or other popular categories. These divisions allow us to identify ourselves with characteristics, behaviors, attitudes and actions. They can also label people to cause stereotypes and bias - like poor, disabled, or racial or religious slurs.
They can become very personal too - aspects of our lives that place us in boxes and become defining characteristics if we let them. My son has Aspergers. My grandmother has cancer. These are boxes that bring immediate associations in people's minds about what life means for them. If we let ourselves, we can become confined by these labels and let them put us in a box. Worse yet, we can start finding safety in our boxes, because they feel familiar or we feel accepted in the box.
God is very specific on our identity. He has a name for us too - we are His. His love, His children, His people. Scripture describes us so many ways, showing God's love, mercy and desire that we would be identified as His. His light cannot be confined to a box as it is part of His character, infinite, eternal and unchangeable.
The Pharisee's were all about boxes too. In Matthew, Jesus calls them hypocrites, white washed tombs, clean and righteous looking but full of death, sin and decay (Matt 23). How often does our desire to fit in or be liked or not make waves do we put ourselves into the box God never intended. Or how about our past, our insecurities or our doubt? Do we let the lies in our heads box us in?
Jesus says to us "In the world you will have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world". (John 16:33) Oh our gracious Savior! He knows the world is hard and He knows our need for courage. He doesn't pretend everything will be easy or that we will be loved by the world. He says in John 17 that the world will hate us. He knows, better than we do, just how great our challenge will be, but He sweetly says to be of good courage. He is the hope.
If we have managed to hide our light and have succumbed to our fear, or past or pain, then we have forgotten who we are. There is no box big enough to contain the love that lives in you through Jesus Christ. Show the world where the light comes from!
Lecrea adds to the song by saying the light is "everything I am, it's the source of my hope and the reason why I stand". This idea is extremely biblical, in stating that the our light is from God, who is our identity and that the light is meant to shine. Jesus says in Luke 8 that a lamp is meant to be on a lamp stand for all to see. In John 8 Jesus calls Himself the light of the world and in Matthew 5 calls the disciples the light of the world, with the purpose of bringing glory to the Father through their good works.
This has me thinking a lot about identity. People can be identified by their tax bracket, their title at work, their political affiliation or other popular categories. These divisions allow us to identify ourselves with characteristics, behaviors, attitudes and actions. They can also label people to cause stereotypes and bias - like poor, disabled, or racial or religious slurs.
They can become very personal too - aspects of our lives that place us in boxes and become defining characteristics if we let them. My son has Aspergers. My grandmother has cancer. These are boxes that bring immediate associations in people's minds about what life means for them. If we let ourselves, we can become confined by these labels and let them put us in a box. Worse yet, we can start finding safety in our boxes, because they feel familiar or we feel accepted in the box.
God is very specific on our identity. He has a name for us too - we are His. His love, His children, His people. Scripture describes us so many ways, showing God's love, mercy and desire that we would be identified as His. His light cannot be confined to a box as it is part of His character, infinite, eternal and unchangeable.
The Pharisee's were all about boxes too. In Matthew, Jesus calls them hypocrites, white washed tombs, clean and righteous looking but full of death, sin and decay (Matt 23). How often does our desire to fit in or be liked or not make waves do we put ourselves into the box God never intended. Or how about our past, our insecurities or our doubt? Do we let the lies in our heads box us in?
Jesus says to us "In the world you will have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world". (John 16:33) Oh our gracious Savior! He knows the world is hard and He knows our need for courage. He doesn't pretend everything will be easy or that we will be loved by the world. He says in John 17 that the world will hate us. He knows, better than we do, just how great our challenge will be, but He sweetly says to be of good courage. He is the hope.
If we have managed to hide our light and have succumbed to our fear, or past or pain, then we have forgotten who we are. There is no box big enough to contain the love that lives in you through Jesus Christ. Show the world where the light comes from!
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Redemption and other gifts I've rejected
For the Precepts course I am teaching this summer, we are on the last week of study, chapters 25-27. In chapter 25, we come to one of the most amazing ideas I think God has ever tried to give His people. A year of jubilee. This celebration, every 50 years was meant to act like a "reset" button on people's lives. In addition to giving the land a rest and enjoying the bountiful provision of God, people returned to the land of their inheritance, even if their fathers/brothers/etc had squandered or lost rights through bad decisions leading to difficult financial circumstances. Jubilee, the land revert back to the owners God had chosen and people had a fresh start.
While this idea alone (which historically was never practiced as God intended) is radical and amazing, God goes further. He brings in the idea of redemption. People who have gotten to such a bad place that the land is gone or they've sold themselves as hired hands and slaves now had a way to be redeemed. A family member could buy them back - redeem them. Or they could buy themselves back. The Jubilee reset the order of the nation to what God's plan had been. Freedom for His people in the land He had given them, with the blessing of an inheritance. God is providing for His people - knowing that things will happen in this fallen world that undo His extension of grace - so He creates a way to restore order.
Now, as 21st century people, when we hear the word "redeemed" in the church, we immediately think of Christ and His work on the cross. We are told all throughout the New Testament that Jesus redeemed us through His blood. (See Galatians 3:13, 4:5; Titus 2:14; 1 Peter 1:18; Revelation 5:9) Salvation, is acknowledgement of our inability to be right with God and relying on Christ's sacrifice alone. Redemption, is an acknowledgement of our spiritual poverty and the acceptance of Christ's payment on our behalf. He is our kinsman who paid the price we cannot afford to bring us back to the order God intended for us all.
But we don't like free gifts. We don't like admitting our need or poverty. Our pride causes us to keep trying to earn our salvation. When we fail to live in God's grace and instead try to work for our salvation, we deny His work on the cross, reject His prefect provision and say "I will do it myself."We, in our poverty, put the weight of our debt back on our shoulders when we reject His payment on our behalf.
Redemption, to our proud and hardened hearts, is so difficult to accept. We have to admit our failure, our poverty and our inability to provide for ourselves. People can stop here actually, and live a devestated life of wallowing in sin and rejection. They can boast in their weakness and reject assistance, feeding on anger and resentment and spite.
Our kids, just lately introduced to Star Wars, have recently heard the famous line "your hate has made you powerful", for the first time. Darth Vador tries to convince Luke that the hate and anger he feels (and the adrenaline associated with it) are good because of the power it gave him. Maybe he was stronger than he would have been without the rage and emotion coursing through his veins. But that still means we are relying on our own strength.
As believers, we aren't called be strong (good or bad) on our own. None of the scriptures ever put the weight of success on us. Rather, we see "but the fruit of the spirit are love, joy, peace, patience..." (Gal 5:22-23). "May the God of hope fill you with joy and peace..." (Romans 5:13) "But He said to me, My grace is sufficient..."(2 Cor 12:9).
We are called to rely on Him, our Redeemer, our Savior and our God. We are called to accept our emptiness while being filled with His Spirit. We aren't called to be strong nor or we expected to stay weak. We are called to be His.
Turn Your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.
Our kids, just lately introduced to Star Wars, have recently heard the famous line "your hate has made you powerful", for the first time. Darth Vador tries to convince Luke that the hate and anger he feels (and the adrenaline associated with it) are good because of the power it gave him. Maybe he was stronger than he would have been without the rage and emotion coursing through his veins. But that still means we are relying on our own strength.
As believers, we aren't called be strong (good or bad) on our own. None of the scriptures ever put the weight of success on us. Rather, we see "but the fruit of the spirit are love, joy, peace, patience..." (Gal 5:22-23). "May the God of hope fill you with joy and peace..." (Romans 5:13) "But He said to me, My grace is sufficient..."(2 Cor 12:9).
We are called to rely on Him, our Redeemer, our Savior and our God. We are called to accept our emptiness while being filled with His Spirit. We aren't called to be strong nor or we expected to stay weak. We are called to be His.
Turn Your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
And if I needed any more support to my lesson from Tuesday night
Teaching Leviticus includes coming upon chapters referencing sexual sin, immorality and homosexuality. It's just going to happen. I will admit, when I first decided to teach Leviticus, I was a little worried about this. I didn't yet know who was going to be in the group and it is not a topic that everyone is excited about discussing. Unless you are in the media and then it seems to be one of the only topics dealt with in the church.
Today, on facebook, I was invited to "like" Chick-fil-A" who is currently under attack for the owners identifying their public support of the biblical model of marriage. This meant one man to one woman for the rest of their lives. One article written attacking them was titled "Chicken with a side of Bigotry, Chick-Fil-A’s Ungodly Business Plan" Since then, there have been a flurry of articles condemning the owners for their bigotry and gay and lesbian organizations trying to organize boycotts against the company. None of this is shocking to me. Unfortunately, I didn't stop at just reading the article. I read the comments to the article. There I found a stream of comments (1529 and counting) about whether or not they agreed with Chick-fil-A. Nearly all the comments I read referenced Leviticus 18 (which we just studied this week). Nearly all of the comments were written by people claiming to be "Christians". These "Christians" argued online using the following types of statements:
"And please know that being gay is a demon"; " By judging them, by condemning them. YOU are the problem with religion, not me. I simply want to live my life and do unto others as I would have them do unto me. Not, you know, judge and condemn and accuse, like you. You are not a Christian."; "Do your research before you begin to spew your hate and bigotry."; "the laws (meaning Leviticus) are irrelevant now and have been irrelevant since the first coming of Christ."; "the Bible takes no stance on committed homosexual relationships"; "The Leviticus Codes are not bound to Christians"; "classic case of pot calling the kettle black you self righteous hypocrite. "; "You are an idiot!"; " I know the Bible does not say homosexuality is a sin."; "If they are consenting adults, it’s all good. And if they love one another, then God blesses that relationship. God really likes it when people love one another."
I'll stop now, but I could go on for a long time just from this one post. The point is, we need to consider how we daily interact in a world where everyone call's themselves "Christian" and touts their knowledge of the bible, but speaks lies and promotes discord. Satan's name translates into "accuser", "deceiver", "opponent", and "adversary". Satan delights in this wildfire of lies - but is even more excited about the division that it brings. What is our responsibility? When do we speak? When are we silent? What do we say?
This is real and it surrounds us daily. Pray about your interactions within this world - be they believers or not - truth is truth. But God's truth is perfectly integrated with His grace and love. We cannot operate the balance nearly as well as Christ. But through the power of His Spirit, He can equip us for every situation. We need to be in a posture of listening to Him and following His prompting both for when to speak and when to be silent. He will lead our way.
Today, on facebook, I was invited to "like" Chick-fil-A" who is currently under attack for the owners identifying their public support of the biblical model of marriage. This meant one man to one woman for the rest of their lives. One article written attacking them was titled "Chicken with a side of Bigotry, Chick-Fil-A’s Ungodly Business Plan" Since then, there have been a flurry of articles condemning the owners for their bigotry and gay and lesbian organizations trying to organize boycotts against the company. None of this is shocking to me. Unfortunately, I didn't stop at just reading the article. I read the comments to the article. There I found a stream of comments (1529 and counting) about whether or not they agreed with Chick-fil-A. Nearly all the comments I read referenced Leviticus 18 (which we just studied this week). Nearly all of the comments were written by people claiming to be "Christians". These "Christians" argued online using the following types of statements:
"And please know that being gay is a demon"; " By judging them, by condemning them. YOU are the problem with religion, not me. I simply want to live my life and do unto others as I would have them do unto me. Not, you know, judge and condemn and accuse, like you. You are not a Christian."; "Do your research before you begin to spew your hate and bigotry."; "the laws (meaning Leviticus) are irrelevant now and have been irrelevant since the first coming of Christ."; "the Bible takes no stance on committed homosexual relationships"; "The Leviticus Codes are not bound to Christians"; "classic case of pot calling the kettle black you self righteous hypocrite. "; "You are an idiot!"; " I know the Bible does not say homosexuality is a sin."; "If they are consenting adults, it’s all good. And if they love one another, then God blesses that relationship. God really likes it when people love one another."
I'll stop now, but I could go on for a long time just from this one post. The point is, we need to consider how we daily interact in a world where everyone call's themselves "Christian" and touts their knowledge of the bible, but speaks lies and promotes discord. Satan's name translates into "accuser", "deceiver", "opponent", and "adversary". Satan delights in this wildfire of lies - but is even more excited about the division that it brings. What is our responsibility? When do we speak? When are we silent? What do we say?
This is real and it surrounds us daily. Pray about your interactions within this world - be they believers or not - truth is truth. But God's truth is perfectly integrated with His grace and love. We cannot operate the balance nearly as well as Christ. But through the power of His Spirit, He can equip us for every situation. We need to be in a posture of listening to Him and following His prompting both for when to speak and when to be silent. He will lead our way.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Moving mountains 101
I'm sitting from my hotel room on vacation staring at the mountains of the desert. We flew over them yesterday and they looked so vast, even from 35,000 feet high. Unlike some mountains, covered in grass and trees until you hit their snowy peaks, these mountains are rock and dirt and sand, with only a few patches of green to break up the brown foreboding landscape. Dry and jagged, there is nothing inviting about these mountains. No one is going to look to these hills and feel a call to climb its lofty heights. These mountains rise up out of the desert as one more barrier to this difficult landscape. Some may see beauty in the desert, but without shade and water, death would quickly come to someone in this lifeless terrain.
Their size and uninviting nature makes me think about the often quoted line of Jesus from the book of Matthew where he tells the disciples that if they had faith the size of a mustard seed, they could command a mountain to move.
Matthew 17 is a very interesting chapter and the setting of this great statement by Jesus is often overlooked.
Peter has seen Jesus feed 5000, and also 4000, walk on water, perform many miracles and has confessed his belief that Jesus is the Christ. Yet, on this mountain, seeing Moses and Elijah, Peter offers to make tabernacles to all 3. God cuts Peter off while he is still speaking and says "This is My beloved Son which whom I am well pleased; listen to Him.". Then Peter, James and John fall on their faces terrified. Peter, like the rest of us, has confessed his belief in Christ several times already, but misses that Christ alone is worthy of worship. He once again is floored by the presence of God, left trembling and silent. The disciples trying to heal the boy were not the only ones lacking in faith. Even those at the transfiguration didn't fully understand who Jesus was.
In Hebrews 11 we have an amazing list of people commended for their faith. But this chapter absolutely blows my mind with the description of what faith actually is. "Now faith is the assurance of things hope for, the conviction of things not seen.". This statement alone is petty complicated, but the author goes on to describe how these people listed all died having not received the promise but having seen it and greeted it from afar. Faith sees the unseen and dies with the assurance of the promise, even though it wasn't fulfilled in their time. Now the disciples had Jesus standing right next to them, but still lacked in their faith. They saw who He was and still missed the truth of His very nature of God and man.
Does Jesus say we can move mountains, because that is something useful for us to do or because it is the impossible being made possible? Are we called to be holy as God is holy because we actually can? Are we called to love one another as Christ loved us because we actually can?
As I study Leviticus, time and time again I see that the law given to Moses was impossible yet in many ways easier to understand. Being told a food is unclean is easier to avoid than when Paul tells us that everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial. The weight is on us to obey the heart of the Lord, not simply a checklist that calls us not eat certain types of bugs. The Law, while perfect and holy, can seem a little easier because it is following things we can see, hear and touch. I can know that I haven't murdered someone - but Jesus knows my murderous and angry heart. I can know that I haven't stolen, but Jesus sees my greed and coveting nature.
Faith that moves mountains makes the unseen things visible - we are confident and assured of the truth of who God is and what He has done for us. Faith that moves mountains doesn't need God to say "yes" to my prayers to make me believe in His power or love or presence. Faith that moves mountains doesn't offer to God my ability to live my daily walk independently and only call Him in on the really hard things.
Faith that moves mountains sees the God who established those mountains before the beginning of time and will shake them again at His return. Faith that moves mountains sees that God calls us to do all things in His strength, never relying on our own. To some, getting out of bed may be a mountain. Going to work may be a mountain. My current favorite verse in scripture right now is Mark 9:24 "I do believe, Lord. Help my unbelief."
My mountain (and I would venture everyone else's too) is my unbelief. The faith that moves mountains isn't about actually making the mountain move - its about offering everything up to the Lord for His provision. Even our own disbelief. Christy Knockles song "Waiting here for You" says "If faith can moves the mountains, let the mountains move. We come with expectation, waiting here for You.". This song is the heart of faith that moves mountains - waiting on God with the expectation of His presence. God has all knowledge, all mysteries, all power. When we depend on His presence, He will move the mountains, part the seas, raise the dead, heal the sick, cast out our demons and provide for our every need. But He will do it in all wisdom for His timing, for His glory, for our best. He established the mountains but He also establishes us. Colossians 2:6-7 says we are rooted in Him and our faith is established in Him. We are told in Ephesians 3:17 says we are established in love (also in Him).
This is our call - not to move the mountains ourselves, but to be established in the One who made them. Whatever your mountain is, be like the Psalmist, who says "I lift my eyes into the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, Maker of heaven and earth.". Look for the Maker of the mountain, and He will move that mountain out of the way so that your focus sees Him more clearly. There you go - your mountain has moved!
Their size and uninviting nature makes me think about the often quoted line of Jesus from the book of Matthew where he tells the disciples that if they had faith the size of a mustard seed, they could command a mountain to move.
Matthew 17 is a very interesting chapter and the setting of this great statement by Jesus is often overlooked.
Peter has seen Jesus feed 5000, and also 4000, walk on water, perform many miracles and has confessed his belief that Jesus is the Christ. Yet, on this mountain, seeing Moses and Elijah, Peter offers to make tabernacles to all 3. God cuts Peter off while he is still speaking and says "This is My beloved Son which whom I am well pleased; listen to Him.". Then Peter, James and John fall on their faces terrified. Peter, like the rest of us, has confessed his belief in Christ several times already, but misses that Christ alone is worthy of worship. He once again is floored by the presence of God, left trembling and silent. The disciples trying to heal the boy were not the only ones lacking in faith. Even those at the transfiguration didn't fully understand who Jesus was.
In Hebrews 11 we have an amazing list of people commended for their faith. But this chapter absolutely blows my mind with the description of what faith actually is. "Now faith is the assurance of things hope for, the conviction of things not seen.". This statement alone is petty complicated, but the author goes on to describe how these people listed all died having not received the promise but having seen it and greeted it from afar. Faith sees the unseen and dies with the assurance of the promise, even though it wasn't fulfilled in their time. Now the disciples had Jesus standing right next to them, but still lacked in their faith. They saw who He was and still missed the truth of His very nature of God and man.
Does Jesus say we can move mountains, because that is something useful for us to do or because it is the impossible being made possible? Are we called to be holy as God is holy because we actually can? Are we called to love one another as Christ loved us because we actually can?
As I study Leviticus, time and time again I see that the law given to Moses was impossible yet in many ways easier to understand. Being told a food is unclean is easier to avoid than when Paul tells us that everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial. The weight is on us to obey the heart of the Lord, not simply a checklist that calls us not eat certain types of bugs. The Law, while perfect and holy, can seem a little easier because it is following things we can see, hear and touch. I can know that I haven't murdered someone - but Jesus knows my murderous and angry heart. I can know that I haven't stolen, but Jesus sees my greed and coveting nature.
Faith that moves mountains makes the unseen things visible - we are confident and assured of the truth of who God is and what He has done for us. Faith that moves mountains doesn't need God to say "yes" to my prayers to make me believe in His power or love or presence. Faith that moves mountains doesn't offer to God my ability to live my daily walk independently and only call Him in on the really hard things.
Faith that moves mountains sees the God who established those mountains before the beginning of time and will shake them again at His return. Faith that moves mountains sees that God calls us to do all things in His strength, never relying on our own. To some, getting out of bed may be a mountain. Going to work may be a mountain. My current favorite verse in scripture right now is Mark 9:24 "I do believe, Lord. Help my unbelief."
My mountain (and I would venture everyone else's too) is my unbelief. The faith that moves mountains isn't about actually making the mountain move - its about offering everything up to the Lord for His provision. Even our own disbelief. Christy Knockles song "Waiting here for You" says "If faith can moves the mountains, let the mountains move. We come with expectation, waiting here for You.". This song is the heart of faith that moves mountains - waiting on God with the expectation of His presence. God has all knowledge, all mysteries, all power. When we depend on His presence, He will move the mountains, part the seas, raise the dead, heal the sick, cast out our demons and provide for our every need. But He will do it in all wisdom for His timing, for His glory, for our best. He established the mountains but He also establishes us. Colossians 2:6-7 says we are rooted in Him and our faith is established in Him. We are told in Ephesians 3:17 says we are established in love (also in Him).
This is our call - not to move the mountains ourselves, but to be established in the One who made them. Whatever your mountain is, be like the Psalmist, who says "I lift my eyes into the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, Maker of heaven and earth.". Look for the Maker of the mountain, and He will move that mountain out of the way so that your focus sees Him more clearly. There you go - your mountain has moved!
Monday, July 2, 2012
Sacrifice of praise
In studying Leviticus for the Precepts class I am teaching, I am spending a lot of time looking at the Old Testament system of sacrifice and praise. Worship of a Holy God required a holy people - a people set apart from those around them and cleansed of their sin. Animals were offered up (first for the priest and then for the people - Lev 9) with the blood being offered on the altar and the animal slain. Death, blood, and fire defined the approach to the Lord, because of the weight of sin and the price of guilt. The symbol protrayed just how fallen we are and just how holy He is. When Christ completes His perfect sacrifice after a guiltess life, He cleanses us, once for all time, creating a way to life instead of death (Heb 9:28).
But the blood itself was a representation of sin bringing death (Romans 6:23) - it was symbolic. The blood did not actually cleanse anything (Heb 10:4). God made the system of atonement for our benefit to better understand ourselves and to learn to relate to Him. His ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9).
Instead, we see verse after verse, throughout the Old and New Testament describing the true approach God desires. (Psalm 40:6, Psalm 51:16, Hosea 6:6, Matt 9:9-13, Heb 10) David writes after being confronted about his sin with Bathsheba "O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." (Psalm 51:15-17)
This whole interaction to me is amazing. David, a man after God's own heart, knows that what the Lord desires is to bring praise and humility. On the Sermon on the Mount (Matt5:3) Jesus says "Blessed are the poor in Spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven".
When I see these verses that combine our sacrifice with brokeness, I can't help but think of some of the commands for Christian conduct given in the New Testament. "Be joyful always, pray continually, be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thes 5:16-18). And in Hebrews 13:15 "Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name."
David saw the heart that God desired - humble praise. But it is a sacrifice, isn't it? When we don't understand what God is doing in our lives; when He leads us through times of trouble; when we are confronted with the ugliness of the sin in our own hearts; these aren't the traditional times to praise. These are the times we question; we doubt; we wrestle.
You know, there are a lot of times where offering up a bull would be a lot easier than bringing to God a humble heart that acknowledges just how far away my life is now from the holiness He calls me to. This is how you end up a Pharisee - go through the motions and lose sight of the heart. When Jesus quotes Hosea in Matt 9:9-13, He is talking to Pharisees who are questioning why He "eats with tax collectors and sinners". Jesus exposes the emptiness of their life - He sees their desire to justify themselves. (This is also what He addresses in the rest of Matthew 5:17-48. He ends with the ultimate challenge in verse 48 - "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.")
The sacrifice of praise is the sacrifice of ourselves. We put ourselves to death. We put our will, our way, our pride, our sin, our guilt; all of it goes on the altar and it creates a soothing aroma for the Lord. Paul tell us in Romans 6: 11-12 "In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires." The sacrifice of praise is one we offer up daily, until Christ comes to take us home. But our God is a consuming fire who can totally remove all our sin and guilt in His sanctifying work. And He has been broken more than we could ever comprehend to bring us to Him.
Hebrews 12:28-29 says "Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
As we tie these things all together we see that our acceptable worship is one that is thankful of who He is and what He has done. When we recognize our need and His holiness, we cannot help but fall to our knees in pure awe. And when we know what He has given us in Christ, we cannot help but praise with thanksgiving. These truths cannot be shaken - regardless of our circumstances or even our own thoughts or feelings. We can be joyful always and thankful in all circumstances, and even pursue the calling of holiness through Christ. We don't thank Him for the trouble - but we praise Him for being unchanging, even in our times of trouble. We don't thank Him for feeling broken - but for His healing hand. We don't praise Him for our struggle - but for His perfect love, that loves us in our sin and ushers us home eternally with Him. This process of becoming more aware of who He is is the peaceful fruit of righteousness (Heb 12:11) that discipline brings. This is the mature faith, unshaken by life (James 1:2-8) and able to rejoice in suffering (Romans 5:3-5). The way we walk through our trials and the faith that results is the offering in which God delights (1 Peter 1:6-9).
Are you broken, weary, sinking under the waves of life? Go ahead and cry! Shout! Shake your fist at the sky! And then sink into the unchanging love of your Heavenly Father. And when you realize that He holds you, even while you hold the weight of the world, you will offer a sacrifice of praise.
But the blood itself was a representation of sin bringing death (Romans 6:23) - it was symbolic. The blood did not actually cleanse anything (Heb 10:4). God made the system of atonement for our benefit to better understand ourselves and to learn to relate to Him. His ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9).
Instead, we see verse after verse, throughout the Old and New Testament describing the true approach God desires. (Psalm 40:6, Psalm 51:16, Hosea 6:6, Matt 9:9-13, Heb 10) David writes after being confronted about his sin with Bathsheba "O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." (Psalm 51:15-17)
This whole interaction to me is amazing. David, a man after God's own heart, knows that what the Lord desires is to bring praise and humility. On the Sermon on the Mount (Matt5:3) Jesus says "Blessed are the poor in Spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven".
When I see these verses that combine our sacrifice with brokeness, I can't help but think of some of the commands for Christian conduct given in the New Testament. "Be joyful always, pray continually, be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thes 5:16-18). And in Hebrews 13:15 "Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name."
David saw the heart that God desired - humble praise. But it is a sacrifice, isn't it? When we don't understand what God is doing in our lives; when He leads us through times of trouble; when we are confronted with the ugliness of the sin in our own hearts; these aren't the traditional times to praise. These are the times we question; we doubt; we wrestle.
You know, there are a lot of times where offering up a bull would be a lot easier than bringing to God a humble heart that acknowledges just how far away my life is now from the holiness He calls me to. This is how you end up a Pharisee - go through the motions and lose sight of the heart. When Jesus quotes Hosea in Matt 9:9-13, He is talking to Pharisees who are questioning why He "eats with tax collectors and sinners". Jesus exposes the emptiness of their life - He sees their desire to justify themselves. (This is also what He addresses in the rest of Matthew 5:17-48. He ends with the ultimate challenge in verse 48 - "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.")
The sacrifice of praise is the sacrifice of ourselves. We put ourselves to death. We put our will, our way, our pride, our sin, our guilt; all of it goes on the altar and it creates a soothing aroma for the Lord. Paul tell us in Romans 6: 11-12 "In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires." The sacrifice of praise is one we offer up daily, until Christ comes to take us home. But our God is a consuming fire who can totally remove all our sin and guilt in His sanctifying work. And He has been broken more than we could ever comprehend to bring us to Him.
Hebrews 12:28-29 says "Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
As we tie these things all together we see that our acceptable worship is one that is thankful of who He is and what He has done. When we recognize our need and His holiness, we cannot help but fall to our knees in pure awe. And when we know what He has given us in Christ, we cannot help but praise with thanksgiving. These truths cannot be shaken - regardless of our circumstances or even our own thoughts or feelings. We can be joyful always and thankful in all circumstances, and even pursue the calling of holiness through Christ. We don't thank Him for the trouble - but we praise Him for being unchanging, even in our times of trouble. We don't thank Him for feeling broken - but for His healing hand. We don't praise Him for our struggle - but for His perfect love, that loves us in our sin and ushers us home eternally with Him. This process of becoming more aware of who He is is the peaceful fruit of righteousness (Heb 12:11) that discipline brings. This is the mature faith, unshaken by life (James 1:2-8) and able to rejoice in suffering (Romans 5:3-5). The way we walk through our trials and the faith that results is the offering in which God delights (1 Peter 1:6-9).
Are you broken, weary, sinking under the waves of life? Go ahead and cry! Shout! Shake your fist at the sky! And then sink into the unchanging love of your Heavenly Father. And when you realize that He holds you, even while you hold the weight of the world, you will offer a sacrifice of praise.
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